It has been so many years since I have seen my parents. So many years with so much strangeness that I have lost track of it all. Now I am sitting in a waiting room. In front of me, behind a desk, a well-dressed young woman with her hair tied in a bun is talking to me. I am meeting with her because she has some news for me. I learn that I will be able to meet my parents! I ask her what has happened, where they have been, why I haven't been able to see them before. She stands up from behind her desk and walks over to me, smiling. She tells me that I will in a few moments see my parents. She points to a door - see, they are right behind that door, and when you see them they will be able to tell you exactly what has happened, and you will be able to ask them anything you want. I am getting scared now. The steps across the room toward the door seem so long and agitating - the uncertainty of what really will be behind that door frightens me. And so the woman opens the door for me, and in steps my dad. He is so tall, taller than I can remember. But it isn't my dad that I am curious about, no, he steps forward and behind him I see mom. Oh, my mom. My whole aware mind freezes at the sight of her. I see a woman, a small woman, whose will for life has left her. Left is only the body, the shell. Her arms are hanging at her sides, almost lacking energy to move, and her eyes are pointed at the floor or somewhere down. She quietly moves in to the room but doesn't look at me. I know she can see me, but neither she nor dad are smiling, crying, or reacting in any way. I am afraid and shocked and curious. Very curious. Where have they been? How much time has passed? And my mother -- she stops right in front of me with her eyes pointed somewhere on my chest. I see her face so clearly now. It is so grey, so filled with dry wrinkles, and so very tired and drained. I have never before seen a face so utterly and completely void of... hope? energy? strength? I don't know what it is, but without it her face and whole appearance is so filled with angst and darkness that it's hard to look at her. Then she speaks to me: "Now I am going to hold you for a while." Those are her exact words. I hear them so clearly, and then we embrace. I am taller than her, and I hold her tight, but my eyes don't get moist even if I do feel emotional - no, instead I cannot get rid of the very strange feeling I have. That feeling of not being able to recognize something in her - and the very sad and scary feeling I had when looking at her - intensifies. I do know that it's my mother, and then she lets go. Now we stand facing each other. Again I see her aged face. She is not old, but her face has changed. Now her eyes begin to move up, and up toward my eyes and face, and when she reaches up there she looks at me in horror! Her face begins to change into a scream, something filled with terror spreads in her eyes as her mouth opens and begins to sound...